Family Portrait

Is this more than a song to you? It was the reality I was facing as a teenager when I went through a very bad and heartbreaking situation in my family. Today things are different and the once broken relationships are mending and being built up again, day by day. For as long as we are alive, there is hope and things can change, no matter how bad they seem.

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Drugs no longer have a hold on me.

"Hi, my name is Samantha. When I was 13 years old, I started smoking weed. At the beginning it was just when socialising with friends then it became an addiction, to the point where me and friends would put our money together to buy some weed. The dependency on weed got so bad that I would steal and sell things just to feed my addiction.

 When I was 14, I started to hang around with drug dealers who sold crack cocaine and heroin. I can remember the first time I took crack. I thought I was going to die. It made me so paranoid. At this point I started to sell drugs to feed my habit. Eventually I stopped smoking crack cocaine at 15 years old, but I still continued to smoked weed. The reason I stopped smoking crack was because I left the circle of friends I was with at the time and I knew it was causing a lot of problems at home.

When I became pregnant at 16, I couldn't smoke weed a lot but now again during my pregnancy I would smoke weed. After the baby was born I went back to smoking weed heavily and continue to do so until I was 22. 

At 17 years old, I became so depressed; my doctor prescribed me with anti-depressants. I became dependant on them for 9 years until I was 26 years old. It was only when I was pregnant with my third child did I decide to stop smoking weed completely. I was determined to be a good mother and not to be controlled by drugs anymore. The will power I had drove me to stick to my decision, though it was very difficult at the beginning. 

The lifestyle I live now is completely different to the one I had as a teenager and in my early twenties. I am living a clean healthy lifestyle free from drugs. I have been able to rebuild my life and now I am at college, training to become a professional chef. For me to get to where I am now was not easy. 

As a result of my drug abuse, I left school without an education and had to start all over again as an adult so I could make something of my life. I spent more time high on drugs then I did in class and as a result, my memory became so bad. Even today, my memory is not so great and at times I find it hard to remember everything I am supposed to do that is important and it has affected my concentration skills. This is a bad side effect and consequence of taking drugs". 

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Can the suffering ever end? Part Two

For many years I suffered and I went searching for help.  I was a catholic, went to various witch doctors, tried the party scene but nothing helped me, nothing filled that dark place and deep sadness inside of me. So, what did I do and how can I now share so much of this hurt in this message? 

6 years ago I found help that transformed my life, took away the hurt, pain, rejection, complexes and depression, and loneliness and if I was to continue the list you would probably get bored.

So let me tell you what happened.  I found someone that loves me so much that He gave His life for me. No, it's not a man, it's Jesus Christ. I found help and started attending the UCKG HelpCentre and it really was my last hope.  I found support and guidance that helped and led me to really know that God is real and could heal the hurt and transform my life. For this process to start I had to first realise I couldn't change my life alone, that I needed help, then that I wasn't alone in my suffering and then to put into practice what I learned and started to build a relationship with God. Something else extremely important was that I had to value myself and think about what I wanted.

Today my life is totally different. Inside i’m full of joy, peace and happiness. I face challenges but never have to deal with them alone because Jesus is with me in all that I do, guiding and protecting me. I am a HR Manager and I absolutely love my job.

The best part is that your life can change too, whoever you are, whatever you have been through or even done. Jesus invites you today to allow Him into your life and to start a new journey with Him in the driving seat, leading you not only to true happiness but eternal life. You can also contact myself or Sibon.  We are here to help. My email address is, change4ever2012@gmail.com, my Facebook page is www.facebook.com/lisa.zapata1 and my Twitter is  https://twitter.com/Lisa_2805. Feel free to contact me. 
 
It's now in your hands; do you accept this wonderful invitation? Go ahead, as I did, you have nothing to lose but so much to gain!

Lisa Hodgkinson

Let me know what you think too please? Xx

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When the penny dropped.

As I was doing some housework the other day, I started to speak to God about something that had been bothering me for sometime and making me anxious. Though I had made countless prayers to be free from what was weighing me down, it seemed to still have a hold of me. Before I could even finish the first sentence “just stop it, stop entertaining the idea, stop giving ears to these thoughts” came to mind. Straight away I knew it was God answering my prayer before I even finished speaking. I saw that I had been feeding the ridiculas thoughts every time they came to my mind. I was the one allowing myself to be anxious and frustrated.

Many times we pray to God for Him to free us from insecurities or complexes we may have, the 'love' for an ex-boyfriend that does not seem to go away, disappointments and many other things, and He does. When we ask Him to free us, He does exactly what we asked for. However, when the negative thought or the remembrance of that particular thing comes back instead of rejecting it and believing that it no longer part of us, we dwell on it. We are the ones that bring back to life what God already took away from us and what we had already determined was history.

We have the power to put to an end many things and after that day, when I decided to change my mindset, I have noticed that what bothered me for so long does not even bother me anymore. In fact I laugh as I write this because it was something so silly that I made “big”.

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The Eagle

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Growing up

Just as physical growth is a function of time (growing inch by inch), Spiritual growth is a function of obedience. When we obey the Word of God, we grow and mature. Knowledge of the Bible does not cause us to grow spiritually but obedience does. How many people are in the church for 10 years, know many verses by heart and have heard hundreds of strong messages but when they face a difficult moment, because they have no strong foundation, they break, they become desperate and depressed, instead of using their faith and remaining strong.

I have been through so much this year in my personal life and even in the church. Many misunderstandings, persecutions, tough battles I have faced which could have easily made me give up. At times I thought I had sinned, or was still possessed because it seemed so hard. Today, God showed me why I went through it. It was for me to mature in my faith; He no longer wanted me to wear spiritual nappies (if you know what I mean?) He wanted me to grow, to be independent and mature. I have come to learn that it’s only through experiences that we grow and as we grow and overcome we are in a better position to one day help someone in great need because we went through it ourselves.

We should not look to hard moments as always bad. Some are tests from God, testing of our faith, whether we are truly of God or not and also for us to grow and learn.
Even more amazing is that after God revealed this to me, the pastor spoke about it in the 3pm service today. This shows when we truly have a relationship with God and are in communion with Him.

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Shame on me

I found myself going through a situation, a hard one that made me feel like I was in a desert. No matter what I did, I couldn’t get myself out of it. I prayed and prayed and asked God, “Why am I going through this”? I didn’t understand. The only thing that came to my mind was a particular person I came across a few years back. I didn’t understand why she was coming to my mind, as I rarely saw her. In fact, I couldn’t even remember the last time I saw her. The more I thought about her, I remembered a hard tough situation she went through. Then the penny dropped.

She had always tried to help me, but because I knew about a problem she was facing, I didn’t take her seriously. I thought, “How can you help me when you yourself are going through similar problems”. I judged and criticized her a lot. Now, years later, I found myself in the same situation as her, facing the same problem.

I felt so bad. The word of God was coming to pass in my life, but not in the way I wanted it to. “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way as you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you”. – Matthew 7:1 – 2. We only look to the promises of God that favour us, but we forget that God is just and that whatever we sow, we reap, even the bad fruits. I saw my wrong, repented from it and though I was paying the price for it, the grace of God was giving me strength to endure it. Just because a person is going through something, it doesn’t mean they are unable to help you. They may have overcome other things that can help you, for we all go through battles every day, no one is exempt from them.

A great lesson learnt, don’t judge anyone or look down on anyone because they are going through a bad and sometimes humiliating situation. One day, we may go through the same thing, but unlike them, you may fall to pieces and never get up again.

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Old nag

I don’t know about you, but I can’t stand to be around someone who nags all the time. If there was a degree in complaining some people would pass with flying colours because that’s their speciality. They complain about everything and anything. Even if there is nothing to complain about, they create a reason to complain.

These type of people (and I used to be one so I know) make it impossible for people to be around them. People flee from them at any given chance. It’s unattractive and puts a burden on those around you. Yes, there may be situations where you feel the need to vent out your frustration, or because you have faced an injustice, but merely complaining to every tom, dick and harry, is not necessary. It gives you the title of an “old nag”.

Nagging does not change anything. Believe me, I know. When I learned this and stopped to be a constant nag, I gained more friends and was not hard to approach but on the contrary, people liked being around me. I also was able to see things in a different way and find solutions to the problems I so often complained about.

So, instead of complaining about your life or a particular situation, do something about it.

Sibon Phiri

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You CAN change

Among your friends, your miss popular. All the guys want you, not because of your intelligence (which you hide) but because of your pretty face, the way you dress and walk.

Your loud, care free and up for anything. But at home, behind closed doors, you cry, cry yourself to sleep. You even contemplate slitting your wrists as a way to let out the pain and anger you feel inside.
You want to break free, to find yourself, but you don’t know how! You think this is all there is to life but I tell you it isn’t. You can be free, you can change!

Do you want to know how? Watch this video and listen to the story of a young friend of mine, who was once like the girl mentioned above. Learn from her story and next time, it could be your story I am posting on here.

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Until when...

Until when are you going to stop blaming others for your failures and take responsibility for your mistakes?

Until when are you going to stop looking at the past and begin working on your present, for a better future?

Until when are you going to realise you are not perfect so why demand perfection from others?

Until when are you going to see that the amount of makeup you were, the night outs with friends, the boys you effortlessly seek to give you a few moments of pleasure and the amount of alcohol you drown yourself with, cannot remove the emptiness you feel inside?

Until when will you learn that you can only overcome your fears by facing them, not running away from them?

Until when will you become independent and take charge of your own life, instead of depending on people all the time?

Until when will you realise that you weren’t born to fit in but to stand out and make a difference?

Until when will you stop putting yourself down and start believing in yourself and your existence?

And until when will you see that there is something inside of you so great, so unique and precious that it can bring into existence what does not exist and change your life and your destiny, completely. It is called faith!

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If your walls could speak, what would they say?

“Tears of pain cried every night because you wish you did not have to live one more day in this miserable world. The countless nights you stay awake because you suffer gravely with nightmares and panic attacks. Never ending complaints about how you wish you were born into a different family and how you long to fit in with the popular crowd at school”. Are these things your all would speak? Well, they were words my walls once spoke but now they sing a new song.

My walls say, “Tears of joy for victories overcame. Sounds of laughter that fills the room. A profound belief in better and glorious days to come. Confidence in who she is and above all, an ever growing relationship with an unseen but True Love that is the reason for her happiness, joy, peace and strength."

No matter what the writing on your wall is today, tomorrow your wall can be singing a new song.

You have more power over your life than you think. If you desire a better life, a new you, you can achieve this. You have to take the decision to change; no one can do that for you. The best advice I can give you is to place your entire life in God’s hands, with no reserves and trust in Him.
Then, “God will wipe away every tear from your eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away…Behold, He makes all things new.” – Revelation 21:4-5

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